anal

So, the first thing I noticed about this book is that at first, it comes across as aimed towards cisgendered/heterosexual vanilla couples. Which makes sense, since really, that’s the demographic that needs a book on anal sex positions, which, IMO, isn’t rocket science.

Personally, I would have liked it if there was more of a broad demo, leaning a little more queer. I especially would have liked some queer models for the photos, but hey, that’s me, what can I say? And again: the demo seems to be cis-hetero-vanilla. Though a little bit of the BDSM leaks through in some of the comments made about power dynamics of different positions.

The first section of the book covers the anal sex basics – the hows and whys, lube, communication, etc. Its a great condensation of the info in Tristan’s ‘Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex For Women’. Not everyone who picks up this book is going to have a solid grounding in the how to’s of butt-loving, so this is excellent information to have!

Also covered in a later chapter are toys, and safety issues with them – the biggest one, IMO, is using a toy with a handle or flared base. It constantly amazes me that people don’t think of that on their own, but if they don’t want to go to the hospital and explain why they got whatever they got stuck in their butt stuck up there…they’ll get something with a flared base.  Tristan also shares my dislike of anal beads made of hard plastic and string – icky! Too hard to clean, and too easy to break. There are sooo many nicer types of anal beads out there, and she shows a variety of pictures of toys for people, so they can know what they’re looking for. Or at. Buying toys can be intimidating, especially if you don’t know what you’re looking for and haven’t ever bought, or even seen, a sex or butt toy before!

I particularly loved that Tristan repeatedly mentioned that, for men, attempting to ‘slip in’ the back door without consent is totally not cool. Having heard stories of that from my friends in the past, I know it does happen. That is the absolute *worst* way to get someone to have the buttsechs with you!

I also love that in the commentary about each position, along with including information like how well the position is for skin to skin contact, or communication, she also covers how the position works, or doesn’t, for those who are larger, have mobility issues, or who may not be as physically strong as others.  This is *excellent* information to have about a position, and this is the first book of sex positions of any type that I’ve read that talks about those issues. (And I’ve read quite a few books about sex positions. I wish someone told me that after four minutes in doggy style I’d be face down, ass up, and hugging a pillow until I built up the upper arm strength to hold it. This is information I would have liked to have known as a teen!) Though I did notice another bit of info I would have liked when I was a newly budding ass queen hadn’t been mentioned – when fucking a man in the ass, make sure you know where his balls are. I still remember the first time I whacked a mans balls with out meaning to because I was enthusiastically fucking him, and he had low hangers. Maybe guys fucking other guys figure this out on their own, but I had to learn from experience.

An excellent section of the book, towards the end, covers how to choose the ‘best’ position for anal sex. Tristan points out that for everyone, this is different. Hell, on different days, different positions are better. She talks about communication, comfort, sexual/power dynamics, access to different body parts and other topics briefly, and suggests a few positions/variations that are best for each issues. (See my doggy style/arm strength issue above

Another thing I enjoy that was carried over from the Guide are the snippets of anal erotica and short fiction included throughout the book. I luuuurved that part of the Guide, and I love it here!

Overall, I think this is a great intro to butt sex book – it covers what I find to be one of the most common questions I’m asked about anal from anal newbies – ‘what position should I try?’I think this is also an excellent book for people looking to try anal the first time, or who are new to it. For me, I find it to be a nice reference, something I can show people when I need to explain a bit of information to them. Its not quite as in depth about anal as Tristan’s ‘Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women’ in terms of anatomy and such, and it doesn’t go over fisting or other extreme anal practices, but as I said, this is a book for beginners. Us anal-sluts all had to start somewhere, and this is a great place to start!