relationships

Ashley and Kisha

by Domina Doll on 08/01/2009

in comstock films, erotic, erotica, lesbian, lesbians, movies

ashleyandkisha Ashley and Kisha

Like Comstock’s other films, “Ashley and Kisha” showcases an intimate relationship between two lovers, whose story is tender and unique.  Ashley and Kisha are two young women who met in college and became lovers.  Ashley is an out-and-proud lesbian, while Kisha considered herself “straight” and not interested in women, until she met Ashley.  During their interview, the women talk about how Kisha initially rebuffed Ashley’s “animal instinct” advances until she tried more “subtler” methods, “easing her way in” to Kisha’s consciousness until Kisha could no longer resist.

The two are a study in contrasts:  Kisha is very conservative, soft and voluptuous; Ashley out-spoken, confident and rebellious with a lean, athletic body.   Ashley takes control in the bedroom, awakening Kisha’s body to a rediscovery of pleasure, a pleasure that only another woman can know.  Both women admit that sex together is the best they ever had.

ashleyandkisha2 Ashley and Kisha

Their story is sweet and amorous, their lovemaking playful, sensual and erotic.  “Ashley and Kisha” is delightful film about the rhapsody of young love between two women and their journey of new sexual discovery.

Ashley and Kisha: Finding The Right Fit (Real People, Real Life, Real Sex series) Ashley and Kisha

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How can I ditch thee? Let me count the ways (Susan Mernit)

by Viviane on 10/20/2008

in dating, social media

. . .In the days of social networks, always-on PDAs, real time tweets and FriendFeed links that update at the speed of light—and are visible to every Looky Lou perusing your account, deleting friends when things cool off can be a highly visible activity (as Xeni Jardin and Violet Blue each discovered when Xeni deleted 60+ posts and comments off her personal blog BoingBoing after the two apparently had a falling out). Therefore, the more politic of us now seem to do what corporate cowards have managed so adroitly for a long time—avoid any dramatic breaks in public contact, but in private, cut the sucker off, perfecting, if you will, the art of being ditched.

Obviously, if you’re dating someone regularly and they stop responding to emails, voicemails, tweets and so on, it’s brush off time for sure, but how about when it’s a more casual relationship, a friendship, or a friends with benefits situation? Can you tell if the person is just busy for the moment, or if you’re truly being ditched?

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When Blogs Cry: How To Breakup Online (Melissa Gira; The Frisky)

by Viviane on 10/07/2008

in bloggers, Blogging, relationships, social media

Cancel, unsubscribe, unfollow. Sort out how you want to react to the breakup only after you’ve canceled the relationship, unsubscribed from her Tumblr, or blocked him from Twitter. To undo a relationship that made it online in any form—whether you’ve got photos together all over MySpace or earned your own tag on Gawker—requires investing as much shared exposure as you put in. Make a cold calculation: in my case, that meant reframing a year-and-a-half long affair, across half a dozen online networks, and doing it in just a few days. This condenses everything: how much it hurts, how fast you have to react. You had weeks or months to attach to one another’s blogs, profiles, and endearingly staged snapshots. Now you have to delete or address it all, all at once.

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Committed to Polyamory Means Several Sex Partners and a Lot of Talking (New York Times)

by Viviane on 10/06/2008

in polyamory

. . .Polyamory gained a degree of cultural vogue in the sexual revolution of the 1970s, when books like “Open Marriage” made best-seller lists and swingers capitalized on the concept to justify experimentation. But while it failed to survive the era of fern bars for the mainstream population, a small but vocal collection of adherents — many borrowing the language of inclusion used in the gay rights movement — argues that polyamory can be a workable, responsible way to live.

Within the past year, books like “Open,” by Jenny Block, and “Opening Up,” by the sex columnist Tristan Taormino, have argued for polyamory. Celebrities like Tilda Swinton and Carla Sarkozy, the first lady of France, have expressed support for open relationships.

This weekend, a group called Polyamorous NYC, with more than 2,000 members, planned to have a three-day Poly Pride Weekend, featuring a picnic and rally in Central Park.

All this does not mean that polyamory has risen above underground status. Edward O. Laumann, a sociology professor at the University of Chicago and a prominent sex researcher, said many sex studies don’t treat the practice as a category of its own.

Dr. Laumann said polyamorists are probably “just talking like that because they haven’t found somebody special.”

But whether it is a movement, or just something a few a couples do, there is little debate that polyamory holds a certain risqué interest for those who would never practice it, and that it can make one’s life very complicated.

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Nine people track their sex-related budgets for one month (Nerve.com)

by Viviane on 10/02/2008

in sex

By Kate Carraway

How we spend our money says as much about our priorities as the people we choose to share a bed with, and often, those two decisions are hopelessly intertwined. Sex, dating and relationships are expensive: flowers, hairdos, clothes, contraceptives, lube, cabs, texts, dinners, (breakfasts?) — how much does it actually come to? Is being single really more expensive than being in a relationship? Are people who make $20,000 spending as much as those who make over a hundred grand?

We asked nine people to spend one month diligently tracking every dollar spent in pursuit of sexual gratification — everything from trolling the bars to getting off solo to full-blown romantic intercourse. Some of the results were surprising, but numbers don’t lie, baby.

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Time Out New York’s Sex in the City issue

by Viviane on 10/01/2008

in nyc

679x600fttonysex 217 300x150 Time Out New Yorks Sex in the City issue

Sex in the city

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Let’s Talk About Sex: Scoop & Shanda (NY Post)

by Viviane on 09/30/2008

in sex

ent037 Lets Talk About Sex: Scoop & Shanda (NY Post)

. . . WORKING from bed was a dream of the Internet age, and Hot 97 deejay Fatman Scoop and his wife, Shanda Freeman, have achieved it. True, their bed is currently in an MTV studio, but they were happy to truck it in from their New Jersey home.

The network picked up the couple’s podcast, “Man and Wife” for a show of the same name that debuted last night.

From the comfort of their comforter, Scoop and Shanda discuss – and demonstrate – questions viewers e-mail them regarding everything from sex and relationships to darker issues such as sexual abuse and sexually transmitted diseases. While you no longer have to be 18 to benefit from the hosts’ abundant wit and wisdom, everything else from the podcast- the bed, Scoop’s boxers, Shanda’s impressive bosom – remains the same.

The original concept for a sex-info show from bed was presented to Scoop by producers Charlie Stettler and Alex Lasky in 2006. He’d tackle sex and relationships and other risqué topics that he couldn’t cover during his day job. It was going to be called “Pillow Talk.”

“I was accepting applications for women to host the show with me, until I realized one night in bed that the woman that’s in my face was the right woman for the job. And she’s my wife, so I don’t have to pay her!” says Scoop.

“It was a natural fit for me,” agrees Shanda. “I used to work in HIV/AIDS services, I was a phlebotomist for 15 years and I was a teenage mom, so I really have a lot of experience that people can relate to.” So much for “Pillow Talk.”

Safe sex is one of the couple’s pet topics, and they say that their own children “have learned about all of this before the rest of America.”

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Dark Odyssey: Summer Camp 08 – Workshop list

by Viviane on 08/19/2008

in Dark Odyssey

summercamp design2 01 Dark Odyssey: Summer Camp 08 Workshop list

Dark Odyssey Summer Camp 2008. Banner photo by Hypnox

Dark Odyssey Summer Camp 2008
September 10-15, 2008
Northern Maryland

RATES GO UP AUGUST 25!
My readers of my blog are entitled to a discount – please email me.

The confirmed list of presenters and workshops for Dark Odyssey: Summer Camp ’08 just went live on the website and we are so excited to share it with all of you!

From a world-renowned porn star and an infamous performance artist to nationally acclaimed authors and award-winning educators, we have presenters from around the world, including:

Anton * Barbara Carrellas * Bear * Beth and Preston * Bobby * British “Lucky” Paul
Captain Beatrice & Benedick * Foxy & Sherifox *  Lady Hilary and The
Marine *  Lee Harrington * Lolita Wolf * Margo Eve & Elkor *  Nina Hartley *
Reid Mihalko & Marcia Baczynski * Sarah Sloane *  Sharrin Spector * Sir C *
Susan B * SwitchMe * Whittney Matlock * Wintersong Tashlin

The most unique, exciting workshops anywhere, with an emphasis on hands-on demonstrations. Plus, there are classes are ones you will ONLY see at Dark Odyssey, some of which have been created especially for the DO community, including:

  • Archetypes: Accessing and Integrating your Sovereign, Lover, Magician and Warrior
  • The Art of Seminal Expansion: Taoist Sexual Practices for Men
  • Becoming Orgasmic Providers
  • D/s Tantra: The Tao of Power Exchange
  • Energy, Magic, Sex and the Great Outdoors
  • Flogging Intensive
  • Getting your FeetÅ Wet: Erotic Energy Play 101
  • Inner Monsters: Delving into the Darkness of our Desires
  • Needle Bound: Merging Temporary and Permanent Piercing
  • Poly for Non-Primary Partners
  • Predicament Scenes: Damned if you do. Damned if you don¹tÅ .
  • A Re-Introduction To The Only-Mostly-Dead Art Of Chivalry
  • Seven Touchstones for Getting and Keeping Passionate Relationships
  • Sucking It Up: Erotic Fire Cupping
  • Urethral Play: A Hole of Your Own
  • Yielding to Brutality: Punching and Kicking with Love


PLUS, LOTS MORE ON…

Sex: Cocksucking, Fisting, G-spot and Female Ejaculation
Relationships: Poly and Practicality, Asking for What You Want
Body Mod Play: Cutting, Advanced Cutting, Branding
Spirituality: Energy Pull Ritual and Erotic Awakening Massage
PLUS: An Entire Track of Classes & Events Devoted to Fireplay

In addition to workshops, Dark Odyssey features creative social activities, nightly special events, erotic rituals, lakeside bonfires, the Sex-O-Rama playspace, and a 10,000 square foot fully equipped dungeon open for play around the clock. Legendary special events include:

Body Beautiful * Sunset Yoga * Night in Flames * Energy Pull Ritual * Garden of Carnal Delights * Cupid’s Gambit * Fucking Machines Show * Cigars & Chocolate * Cuddle Party * Fire Spinning * Petting Zoo * Pajama Party

All this happens in a fun camp environment at a retreat with great accommodations: forty cabins with real beds, full bathrooms, hot water showers, and electricity; two swimming pools, canoeing, and hiking; plus, breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a midnight snack included.

Unlike a typical conference event, where you have to pay for registration fees, hotel room costs, plus meals, Dark Odyssey is an all-inclusive event.
Current registration rates are good through August 25, but you can register up until September 9.

Visit our website for more details. We hope you will join us for this exciting event!

Best Regards,

The Producers of Dark Odyssey:
Tristan, Greg, Karri, and Colten

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Sexual Legacies from the Men in my Life (Suzanne Portnoy)

by Viviane on 08/19/2008

in relationships, sex

My friend and fellow blogger Mimi’s most recent post ‘Legacies from the Men in my Life’ got me thinking, not in a general sense but in a sexual one. Funny that. In truth, the men in my life have probably taught me more about sex than about anything else. I’ve always been a self-contained, opinionated woman with a wide variety of interests so it’s hard to separate what I actually learned by myself from what I was taught by the men in my life. Actually, that’s not totally true. My ex-husband taught me a hell of a lot about music. And the one after that, the alcoholic, taught me I’m a very bad drinker. Whereas the one after that taught me how to make a very nice martini using apple and orange juice. He also taught me that when a man tells you ‘I’m a one woman man,’ he very rarely means it. The same man told me that I’d look much better with short, curly hair and he was right.

Then there’s the Sexual Legacies. In no particular order:

Ex-husband – I was young. I was relatively inexperienced (but thought I knew it all) So was he. When we got divorced, I was none the wiser.

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legacies from the men in my life (sexagenarian and the city)

by Viviane on 08/19/2008

in relationships

And I don’t mean money. I mean culture, understood in the widest sense.

Whatever about the men, intimacy with them put me in touch with a wide variety of microcultures.

I wonder what legacies, if any, they have from me.

* * *

from my first husband

Agatha Christie, Dorothy Sayers, Mozart opera; some sense of how a genius thinks (he was — still is, I suppose — a genius); an understanding of what it was like to grow up Catholic in the U.S. in the 1950s; some sense of what ‘Canadian’ means; a visionary notion of political activism

(he was passionate about Native American education; against the then corrupt miltary regime in Chile; against capital punishment, etc.)

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Dudes Today: The Emotional Conquistador Is The New Sexual Conquistador (Jezebel)

by Viviane on 07/08/2008

in dating

I’ll admit that casual sex for me is a total defense mechanism in order to experience intimacy without risking emotional detriment. I’d so much rather be fucked than fucked with. So when some guy suggested to me last week that we merely make out all night instead of have sex, I was immediately cautious of his intentions. It sounds backwards, I know, but it’s, uh, progressive. Right?

. . .

But I totally should’ve trusted my instincts, because they’ve never failed me before. Especially when one night, he actually asked me to enumerate all the things I liked about him. I thought it was weird, but I obliged with utter honesty, “You’re funny, you’re smart, you’re cute, you’re charming, blah, blah blah.” I ended with, “I like you so much it’s scaring me.” And it was then that he got what he wanted. About 30 hours later, after spending the entire weekend together—brunching, cuddling, kissing on the street, holding hands, playing Connect Four, while sober, mind you—I received a text that said that he really needed to be alone, and he hoped I would understand.

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