Bend Over Boyfriend (1998)
Studio- Fatale Media
Director- Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano
Cast- Dr. Carol Queen, Robert Morgan, Laura Goodhue, Cupcake Jones, Greg Heiman, Troy, Miss Behavin’

Bend Over Boyfriend came out in 1998 and was the first and only instructional video of its kind to introduce anal pleasure for men, through strap-on sex with a female partner.  Although today the film seems a bit dated, compared to newer films of the same topic, like Tristan Taormino’s “Expert Guides”, at the time of its launch the film was groundbreaking and has remained one of the best-selling videos on this topic of all time.

While I have read some praise for the film, I have also read some criticism including that it is “too instructional”, “not erotic”, and that it has an “infomercial quality and the officious attention to every detail”.  This makes me wonder what people think an instructional film is.  I mean really.  I don’t expect instructional films about sex to be erotic, or to lack instruction.  I want them to teach me something in the simplest way possible.  I want the people presenting the topic—in this case Dr. Carol Queen and Robert Morgan—to be enthusiastic, knowledgeable and experienced, and to provide details, even if they are not always relevant to me.  I don’t necessarily want to be entertained or aroused by the content, or expect it to get an Academy Award.  I want to learn something new.  If I wanted to just watch people fuck, I’d rent a porno.

Now, I’ll admit that academics are often a bit dry.  After all, Carol Queen is not an actor, but an educator, although she does know and present her topic better than any actor could.  And, while she does recommend products at the end of the film and where to buy them (read: resources), I think it is certainly useful if the general public doesn’t have a clue about anal dildos or strap-ons, which was certainly the case back in 1998.  And, let’s remember that sex shops were not always as sex-positive or as helpful with knowledgeable staff as they are today.

I think Bend Over Boyfriend is a great film and it is easy to see why it has had such longevity.  Carol and Robert are passionate about their topic and very experienced.  They talk about anatomy, prostate pleasure and health, relaxation and massage, safe sex, arousal, gender-bending, and the best tools for anal stimulation (including mouth, tongue and fingers!).  After this ten minute intro, they show you enthusiastically how it is done (and while this is probably not erotic for the viewer, I bet it was for them).  The film also includes two other male/female couples that demonstrate different scenarios, variations of anal pleasure and sexual positions.  So Bend Over Boyfriend was an excellent guide when it first came out, and today I believe it still has information that is valuable to share, especially for couples seeking to explore anal sex for men and gender-bending for the first time.

Thank you to Babeland for this trip down memory lane.  Be sure to check out Bend Over Boyfriend and all the other excellent instructional films they have in their store as well as their Bend Over Boyfriend Strap-on Kit.

The G-Rider is a P (or G) spot toy made by Nexus, a brilliant sex toy company out of Britain.  They make a whole series of wickedly designed P-spot vibrating anal toys specifically for men.  And, it’s about time.  Next to the Aneros and Rude Boy, there isn’t much out there for excellent quality P-spot toys for guys.

I have found in my experience with P-spot toys, what is good for the Goose is usually also good for the Gander.  Meaning, P-spot toys for men are usually interchangeable as G-spot toys for women and visa-versa.  Not having a P-spot of my own I can’t tell you what it feels like there, but I can tell you how it works on the female G-spot.  But, first, a few details about the toy itself.

First of all, the G-Rider is shaped much like the Aneros toys, and has a hard core that keeps its shape.  However, unlike the Aneros which is constructed of hard plastic, the G-Rider is coated in the most sensual velvety silicone.  As soon as I pulled it out of its plastic box I wanted to rub it all over my body and holding it now I have the same urge.  It is very high quality silicone and smells so good you’ll want to eat it.  The texture reminds me of some exotic sci-fi creature’s sensual skin, and being bright pink, you could imagine that a strange hybrid penis of a mythical beast might look and feel like this.

The manufacturers have included clear instructions on how to use the toy as well as an illustration defining the parts of its design.  Shaped like an upside-down capital T, the toy features a handle at the bottom with a nubbed perineum stimulator on one side.  The main shaft is short and curved, with a rounded crooked finger that is the P-spot massager part.  On a woman, the finger acts as the G-spot massager and the perineum stimulator as the clitoral stimulator.  The base features the battery compartment and the control button, with 5 vibration settings.

For anal play, the instructions say to wash it (obviously) and suggest cleaning the anus with a douche beforehand.  To insert, use plenty of lube (water-based), relax and insert slowly.  Then you are free to turn on the vibe and ride the “waves” to orgasm, either by leaving it in place or rubbing it against the P-spot.

There are no instructions for vaginal (G-spot) penetration, so here are mine.  Empty bladder.  Apply your favorite water-based lube to the head of the crooked finger.  Insert.  Turn on and play.  The G-spot enjoys firm pressure and often drumming or rubbing, so do what feels best to you.  The way this toy is curved, the finger part feels exactly like the come-hither movement that is ideal for G-spot stimulation if you rock the toy just the right way.  It feels amazing and I have to say (despite being a toy designed for men) this is one of the best G-spot (for women) toys I have ever tried.  The curve is perfect for rubbing and once you feel the urge to squirt, for thrusting and drumming.  Also, the vibrations are fairly powerful and easily felt in this vibe.  Before, I have never really found vibration on my G-spot to make much difference, but here I really noticed it and know it aided in my stimulation and orgasm.

So, I rate this toy an A+ for G-spot stimulation, which just goes to prove that boy toys are fun for girls too.  I imagine this toy would also be stellar for guys as well.

You can find the Nexus G-Rider at TabuToys.com where they carry many different G-spot Vibrators.

Ducky delivers a butt sex basics sex ed episode for Cherry TV.

….unhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The thickness all of a sudden was slid into me. Fully and completely. The pain and pleasure hitting me equally. My ass being penetrated quickly and fast. It was amazing. Intense. The initial pain subsided as they left the thickness deep inside me. Letting me adjust to it. I pushed myself further back, taking it as far as a could. A deep and guttural moan escaped from my mouth. It was exactly what I wanted and needed. I didn’t care who and how, but it’s what I needed.

They slowly eased the thickness out of me. My ass savored every centimeter of it. And just before it was out it was shoved deep back into me.

“Yes. Please. Ah.”

I needed more. Sensing it. They started to pull out again. Quicker this time. Again pushing back in deep and hard. The pace quickened. The thickness fucking me now with deep and deliberate penetrations. The strokes were smooth and measured. The intensity building every so slightly.

Two hands grabbed my hips and pulled me up onto my knees. Holding my hips the thrusts were deeper and harder. My face on the bed. Moaning deeply and loudly. Begging for more.

“Fuck me. Take me. Yes. More. Harder.”

Link.

You can never use too much lube, especially if you are trying to fit large things in tight places – like if you are fisting or if you are fucking someone up the ass. But lube is often also necessary for regular vaginal intercourse, too. A woman’s natural lubrication is dependant on her hormones. A woman will generate less of her own lube during certain times of her monthly cycle, after having a baby or after menopause. Even if she gets plenty wet on her own, those marathon fucking sessions will need extra lube. And, of course, asses always need lube because there’s no natural self-lubrication.

So, I like lube, but am not terribly picky about what kind. I usually grab whatever is around or whatever my partner likes. I prefer water-based lube because it is easy to clean up. When I do shop for lube, my brand of choice is ID Glide. It lasts a pretty long time without getting sticky. It doesn’t smell bad. And it’s nice and slippery.

Two of my fuckbuddies (one male and one female) really love Gun Oil lube. I was surprised because they both had the same lube and both swore by it. Contrary to its name it does not contain oil. Oil is not compatible with latex and it is hard to wash out of your cunt. I don’t like oil-based lubes.

Gun Oil Lube is silicone-based and it contains Aloe Vera and Vitamin E which makes it nice for your skin. Silicone does not get absorbed into the body quickly. It does not rub off or dry out. It lasts and lasts. And you don’t have to use a lot. This is good if you want to stick a butt plug in somebody and leave it in for a long time or if you want to play in the swimming pool. The one big warning with silicone lubes is: do not use them with silicone toys. The chemical reaction will ruin the toys.

cru is an anal expert and turned me onto Boy Butter H20. Water-based, yet creamy thick. Really nice for use with my silicone butt plugs.

Ha! As an economist, I am amused that I have both Guns and Butter.

I love my njoy butt plug. I am a huge fan of butt plugs in general, but this one is extra special. It’s shiny.. It’s pretty. It’s manufactured using a medical grade of stainless steel, so I do not have to worry about my nickel allergies. The toy is sleek and inserts smoothly, especially when lube is added. You can use any kind of lube with this. I’ve used ID Glide (water-based) as well as Gun Oil Lube (silicone-based).

I have the medium size and I love feeling the weight inside me. The medium weighs a hefty 7 ounces. Unlike most other plugs, it stays in. I seem to have a problem with most other plugs because they slip out so easily. Some even shoot across the room when certain muscles contract. Ha! Because it’s metal, it retains temperature. I have heated mine up under some hot running water. You could also refrigerate it if you want to be nasty.

I like this butt plug when combined with clitoral stimulation and I like it combined with vaginal penetration and I really really like all three at once. I’ve tried it on some of my partners (all genders) and they liked it too.

The ring at the end acts like a flange and also makes it easy to grab when you put it in or pull it out. That’s important because it gets very slippery when lubed up. It’s also nifty because I can run some rope through the opening to combine with a crotch tie.

Because it is nonporous stainless steel, this plug is really easy to clean. It can go into the dishwasher. You can even boil it or autoclave it. I store it in the box that it came in so it won’t get scratched. It’s a really luxurious high-end black box with a hot pink satin lining.

One other thing: I’m going to try is hooking it up with alligator clips to an electrostim device like a TES unit or an Erostek. I think that would be a really fun ride!

I’ve read Nerve since it’s inception, so I was thrilled to see viewers from Nerve Scanner on my Statcounter.

Thank you Erin Bradley, for linking Mikey Mongol’s post about the anal hook.

Mikey knows how to find the choice stuff!

FDA is issuing this advisory to alert you to the potential hazards of using skin numbing products, also known as topical anesthetics, for cosmetic procedures. These topical anesthetics contain anesthetic drugs such as lidocaine, tetracaine, benzocaine, and prilocaine in a cream, ointment, or gel. Topical anesthetics are widely used to numb the skin for medical and cosmetic procedures, and to relieve pain and burning and itching due to a variety of medical conditions. FDA has approved many products for these uses. Some must be prescribed by a doctor; others may be purchased without a prescription. Applying topical anesthetics for a medical procedure is usually done in a doctor’s office by a trained medical professional. However, FDA is aware that use of these products before a cosmetic procedure may not be supervised by trained health professionals. Without this supervision, a patient may apply large amounts of topical anesthetics to their skin. This application can result in high levels of these products in the blood causing life-threatening side effects, such as an irregular heartbeat, seizures, and death. (more…)

[via violet blue]