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I Did It For Science - Rev Jen visits a Joe Gallant set

Feb 1st, 2006 by Audacia Ray

INTRODUCTION:
I am not a huge fan of porn. Given the choice between porn and reruns of Charles in Charge, I’d probably opt for the latter. Most adult films appear to rely on a predictable L.A. formula: Barbie gets banged by Ken while both recite trite banter referencing either the size of Ken’s manhood or the tightness of Barbie’s holes. All of that happens on a shoddily art-directed set with no plot and bad makeup. Either that, or it’s too softcore, like watching a Lifetime original movie with exposed nipples.
But I’m guessing porn directors aren’t looking to satisfy my tastes. When it comes to porn, my fave is probably the big-budget costume epic Caligula, and I’m not sure that counts by today’s standards. Rather than critiquing modern-day porn, maybe I can get involved in its production and improve the genre. And if that doesn’t work, maybe I can learn to love porn for what it is.

MATERIALS:

Please list all the materials required for this experiment (including, if applicable, how they were obtained).

– Porn shoot (two)

METHOD:
In this portion of your report, you must describe, step-by-step, what you did in your lab. It should be specific enough that someone who has not seen the lab can follow the directions and recreate the same lab.

Trying to find a porn director in New York is like looking for a scuba instructor in Kansas. Most porn comes out of L.A., a city that attracts actors who want to fuck on film. New York attracts performers who want to sing Billy Joel songs on Broadway or star in off-off Broadway productions about their vaginas. Hence the pickings are slim.
Luckily, a friend who’d just returned from the AVN Awards referred me to Joe Gallant, the founder of Black Mirror Productions. I sent Joe an e-mail requesting clothed work on one of his films.
“No problem, Jen, baby. Call my cell,” he responded.

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